“I have learned over the years that when one’s mind is made up, this diminishes fear; knowing what must be done does away with fear.” – Rosa Parks
Ten weeks and counting until moving day. [Insert appropriate “time flies” expression here.] Until this point, nothing has really sunk in. Of course I’ve been getting excited, and I’ve had the occasional “holy crap!” moment where I feel as though I’m going to burst with the crazy reality of it all, but this week for the first time, the fear set in. I felt unsettled.
The thing is, I can’t quite pinpoint why. The answer should probably be obvious. I mean, I’ve moved a few times in my life, but never to a different country, let alone across the ocean. For a small-town Saskie girl, it’s kind of a big deal.
When I moved from Saskatoon to Calgary five years ago, I was on my own for a month before my friend joined me in our apartment. I had an air mattress and a computer. It was enough. I was ready to start a new chapter, meet new people, get my first “real” job. I would sit in the coffee shop a couple of blocks away for a few hours in the evenings just to be around people. Finally I got hired as a waitress (the publishing job came along a few weeks later). That job was a godsend, and I’m so grateful to have met some lifelong friends there. Anyway, enough of my stroll down memory lane.
The point is, I’m not afraid of moving alone – that’s half the adventure. I think it’s simply the fear of the unknown that’s tugging at me, the inability to picture what my life is going to look like. And this is the kind of fear that should be overcome at all costs, because it can become debilitating. It’s part of the reason it took me ten years to finally decide to move to London. It disguised itself in many ways.
Today, I acknowledge the fear, and I choose to move past it. Because if I don’t see what’s on the other side, I know I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.
Is fear of the unknown preventing you from taking a leap to something you want? It’s a tricky little devil in disguise.